Ask yourself this question: When was the last time you had sex with your husband? By sex, this means both of you enjoyed the night and were able to achieve maximum sexual satisfaction?
According to marriage satisfaction statistics, men have higher sex drives than women, and it is usually the husbands who initiate sex. You may not admit it, but you never fail to come up with excuses to say no to sex.
You can get the spark back inside the bedroom and bring sex satisfaction in your marriage. In case you are wondering how, check out these 15 tips on how to restore sex satisfaction and say yes to happy marriage.
1. Survey Speaks: Acknowledging the Problem in Your Marriage
Did you know that the divorce rate in America is almost at 50 percent? An Indiana University study also revealed that 19 percent of women and 23 percent of men reported cheating on their spouses.
Although not to be tolerated, a marriage satisfaction survey showed that sexual excitability is the reason why most men cheat. As for you, unhappiness in the relationship is the reason why you say no to your man, and most women’s reason for cheating.
The truth is that you don’t need to resort to cheating just because you are unhappy in your marriage. Getting your marriage back on track is challenge that doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a working progress that needs commitment, a lot of time, rebuilding intimacy, and acknowledging the problem in your marriage.
How can you do it? Keep reading for tips on how to boost your marriage satisfaction scale and bring back sexual satisfaction in marriage.
2. Deal With Your Stressors to Get Your Sex Life Back on Track
Blame it on depression, kids, financial worries or relationship troubles, but one thing is for sure: stressors could be the reason why you are always not in the mood and constantly say no to your man whenever he wants some action.
Start by facing your issues. Acknowledge what you need to do, and take baby steps and eliminate whatever is bothering you. Take a break once in a while, learn to say no when you’ve had enough, ask help from your family for extra hands when it comes to your kids, and allow yourself to rest when everything else seems overwhelming.
The results are not instant, but once you are at peace with yourself, everything else will follow.
3. Lose Extra Weight to Get Your Libido Up and Running
Is your gym membership card collecting dust already? Perhaps, it’s time to adjust your schedule and squeeze “work outs” on your “Must Do” list. It’s not just about the excess pounds. Putting on extra weight could take a toll, not just on your libido, but also on your self-esteem.
According to a study by Duke University researchers, obesity could cause issues with any or all of these three factors:
- Sex drive
- Sexual desire
- Performance in bed
This is because excess weight could lead to physical conditions, such as high cholesterol and diabetes, which impacts your overall sexual function. This leads to lower quality of sex life.
Skipping junk and processed food is a good place to start losing weight. Add “running” in the routine, do chores, trade the elevators for the stairs, and walk as much as you can. Plan your family activities, such as swimming or biking to get everyone in shape. Believe it or not, this will make you feel sexier and more confident, which could translate inside the bedroom.
Go ahead and stay sexy. The best part is your husband will notice the changes, for sure.
4. Do the Throwback and Take a Trip Down Memory Lane
Here’s the thing about women: you don’t take off your clothes and have sex just like that. Even if you are married, you and your husband should establish a loving connection first before getting naked. The challenge now is how to establish that connection to help you get your groove back.
It might sound cliché, but going on a date, enjoying good food, and sitting with your husband talking about anything, while remembering the old days could do a lot to jump start your sex life. This gives you a break from all the stress you and your husband are going through. At the same time, spending time together could be a good reminder of why you are married.
That’s not all. Rekindling old feelings and bringing romance back in the relationship could be a good way of making you feel younger again.
5. Say Yes to Quality Over Quantity When Making Sex Your Priority
During one of your friendly neighbors’ dinners, one of your friends said that she and her husband are having sex every day. You suddenly feel the pressure to up the game and increase frequency, so you will feel proud the next time they ask.
Apparently, quantity or frequency is not the best gauge on whether marriage satisfaction is in cloud nine. In fact, it’s all about quality.
Men are wired to crave good sex. If you want to take things to the next level, then you need to make sure you give him the best. This means focusing on other sources of pleasure aside from his penis, and making sure that his needs are met.
You can start by doing the next tip.
6. Blow Job 2.0: Mastering Your Oral Skills to Enhance Marriage Satisfaction
Do you want to know the secret to ensure sexual satisfaction in married couples? You should give him the best blow jobs you possible can.
Oral sex, aka a blow job is an excellent precursor to a man’s satisfaction inside the bedroom. To keep him satisfied, make sure you are up to the challenge. Here are tips to make him want you bad and please your man in bed:
- Wetter is better when pleasing your man orally. Using lots of saliva makes the experience more sensual and provides better stimulation.
- Stimulate his penis’ tip longer, since the tip is more sensitive than the rest of his penis.
- Combine your mouth, tongue, and hands when giving him a blow job.
- If you are okay with it, let him finish in any areas of your body like chest, butt or face.
Don’t worry. He will reward you after for a job well done and will surely return the favor. Speaking of hands, check out this next tip that will surely blow your husband’s mind.
7. Take Matters Into Your Own Hands – Literally
According to marriage satisfaction inventory ideas, giving your husband a hand job is another way to ensure that he is happy in bed.
How do you do it? Here’s how:
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Photo by Kiyok / CC BY-SA Lubricate your hands using oil, petroleum jelly, or lubricant.
- Clasp your hands together with your fingers interlaced.
- Wrap your hands tightly around his penis, but not too tight since you might affect the circulation down south.
- Move your hands up and down while doing the twist motion.
- Once he is firm enough, clasp your hands at the top of his shaft. Contract and release your hands around the shaft with one-second interval.
- When he is about to finish, run your thumb from the base of his shaft up to the penis head.
Once you mastered the blow job and hand job techniques, you can start doing both at the same time to ensure sexual satisfaction.
8. Change Things Up and Try New Positions in Bed
Fine, you are comfortable doing the missionary and doggy style and you like being on top of him. Apparently, men are men and they need variation to keep them happy inside the bedroom, including your husband.
What can you do?
Expand your horizons and try new positions inside the bedroom. Here are some ideas:
- Let your man sit down on a chair or sofa. Give him a lap dance then slowly, allow him to enter you.
- Put your ankles on your husband’s shoulders, thereby lifting your butt in the air. Your husband should hold your legs as he enters you.
- Do the doggy style, but with a twist. Instead of kneeling, your husband should support your lower body as he enters.
If you need to keep up and looking for extra hand inside the bedroom, HerSolution could be a great help. It is a natural libido supplement that helps you want sex – and actually enjoy it.
In relation to changes, here is another tip you can try to keep him looking forward to your next session.
9. Give Him a Show That Will Surely Excite Him
Aside from their biological nature, men are also erotic visualists. This means they get easily aroused by visual stimulation, such as naked women. In fact, some men enjoy seeing a woman reach climax and consider it as the ultimate form of arousal.
How does it help in sex and marital satisfaction?
If you’re up for it, go ahead and give him a show. Put on his white shirt or wear nothing but sexy high heels, sit down, open your legs wide, and touch yourself. Let him watch while as you give yourself pleasure. Believe it or not, this could one of the sexiest things you can do that will surely turn him on. Consequently, you might be surprised how empowering you will feel after knowing that you have than intense effect on him.
It’s okay to feel embarrassed at first. Don’t force yourself if you’re not into it. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be able to give him a good show.
10. Go Beyond the Penis and Say Hello to Other Parts of His Body
Admit it. During steamy sessions, you tend to focus on his man down there – and nothing else. After all, men have fewer erogenous zones and the whole point of sex is to make sure that his member is happy.
Apparently, that’s not the case. If you are serious about ensuring sexual satisfaction in marriage, then you need to get past his penis and focus on other areas of his body, too. This gives him the ultimate sexual experience, thereby making it more pleasurable.
Where to Touch Your Man During Sex
- Nipples – Some men want this while some men don’t. Nonetheless, a man’s nipples provide a different kind of sensation that will surely drive him wild. Try sucking on an ice cube then suck on his nipples. This could heighten sensation and makes him extra excited.
- Neck – The area between his ear and collar is a surefire erotic spot. However, try this: the area below his Adam’s apple. According to ancient Chinese medicine, the thyroid, which is linked to the sex organ, is halfway down the front of his neck. Hence, don’t forget to pay attention to this spot.
- Perineum – This is the area between his anus and scrotum and surprisingly, this area is loaded with major orgasmic power. While giving him a blow job or before he enters you in missionary position, lick or gently stroke this area for added pleasure. He won’t admit it, but he will love it for sure.
- Frenulum – This is another area that deserves your attention. Frenulum or the F spot is the knob of flesh underneath his penis crown which connects to the shaft. In fact, erotic experts refer to this as the booty’s bull’s eye because of the bundle of nerves in this area.
11. Give the Mommy Hat a Break and Wear Your Wife Hat as Much as You Can
Let’s face it. Marriage satisfaction after baby drops massively. All of a sudden, you are this doting mother who made your child as the center of your universe.
That’s fine. However, don’t forget that aside from being a mother, you are first and foremost a wife too. Aside from your kids’ needs, your husband needs your attention too – and one of the simplest, yet most effective ways to show that is through sex and intimacy.
Therefore, don’t forget to play your role as a wife. Learn about his needs, both in and out of the bedroom, and make sure you relay what you want, too. By paying attention and continuing to look after each other, you will be able to make each other feel special – and this will show inside the bedroom.
Don’t forget to pop HerSolution enhancement pills in case the situation calls for it. In relation to this subject, check out the next tip to make sure you keep your man sexually satisfied.
12. Keep Calm and Flirt With Him Like There’s No Tomorrow
Here’s the thing with most marriages: the longer you two are together, the lesser the intimacy. This means you seldom play the intimacy card and just get comfortable with each other. The issue with this kind of set up is that it does little in ensuring marriage satisfaction.
Do you want to turn things around? Try flirting.
It sounds simple, but flirting keeps the passion alive – both in and out of the bedroom. In fact, it plays a vital role in your marriage and relationship in general. Consequently, flirting keeps the romance alive, which helps in keeping intimacy intact.
Go out on dates. Hold hands whenever in public. Kiss often. Hug whenever you see each other. Send flirty messages. The bottom line is don’t let romance die down just because you are together for more than a decade. Your sex life will be happy, too.
Aside from flirting, check out the next section to find out another way to rebuild intimacy and enhance sex satisfaction in marriage.
13. Say Yes to Talking Dirty and Keep Your Man Happy
Are you looking for a quick way to turn him on? Try dirty talking.
Men have different opinions when it comes to talking dirty. Still, one thing is for sure: your husband will like it if you are vocal while doing the deed. The truth is, moaning and telling him how much you like what he is doing is enough to ensure sexual satisfaction.
Let’s face it: you feel embarrassed and less confident to utter those lines. That’s fine. Try these simple techniques to help you talk dirty inside the bedroom:
- Start with moans and sighs, and eventually, start saying his name.
- React to what is currently happening.
- Avoid any silly terminology or terms that doctors use.
- Keep your voice lower and softer.
- Give him instructions on what you want him to do.
- Tell him how much you love what he is doing.
14. Communication is Key to Keep Your Marriage Healthy
When was the last time you had a conversation with your husband? By conversation, this means going beyond the instruction of picking your youngest son from soccer practice and getting the dry cleaning.
If you are not able to sit down with your husband and talk about anything, then you need to change things up and bring sex satisfaction back in marriage.
Try this technique: everyday, 20 to 30 minutes before you sleep, lie down with your husband and discuss about how your day went. Share your hopes, dreams, and things you want to do with your life. If you have any secrets to tell, share it with him.
The whole point of this exercise is to get you both talking and bring you closer together. The framework is there and you both need to be reminded of what you have together as a couple. The best part is you can pick up something from what he said, which you can use on your next session.
Don’t worry. He is listening to you, as well, which leads you to the next tip.
15. Fulfill His Fantasies One Step at a Time
This is the reason why you need to keep communication lines open. When you get your man to open up, he is able to tell you his kinks and fantasies. Keep an open mind and listen to what he has to say.
Here comes the challenge: fulfilling his fantasies.
One of the effective ways to ensure sex and marital satisfaction is by exploring his fantasies. You can start with something simple but never done before and cross them off in the list one by one. Don’t pressure yourself to fulfill all his fantasies, especially if you’re not up for it. It’s enough that you were willing to explore with him, and that is enough to keep him hooked.
A piece of advice: make sure you are willing to explore and do these fantasies. This will make the experience more pleasurable and enjoyable if you are willing to do them not just for your man but also for yourself. If there are fantasies that make you want to hit the break, be honest and tell him about it.
16. Change Your Approach and Show Him That You Are Excited to Be Intimate with Him
Do you want to know another secret? While all of these tips will help, all of these techniques are useless if you don’t have the attitude to back them up. In other words, if you want these tricks to be effective and make sure that sexual satisfaction is achieved, then show him you are excited to sleep with him.
Most married couples, especially women, are having a Miranda moment where sex felt like a chore and that they can’t wait to get over it. Ditch the attitude because it will show in your performance inside the bedroom.
Instead, be enthusiastic about your steamy sessions. Show him that you are genuinely excited to try new positions, do something new inside the bedroom, and willing to try the techniques mentioned. The more enthusiastic you are, the better the turn out will be, which will surely make your man happy.
The Challenge
Now that you know how to boost sex and marital satisfaction, it’s now time for the ultimate challenge: putting these 16 tips into action. Keep in mind that getting your groove back in the bedroom doesn’t happen instantly. Take it one step at a time and you will surely achieve sex satisfaction in marriage.
When you finally achieved satisfaction, try this marriage satisfaction quiz and see how much it changed your married life.